13 Month Check Up

Lil Ashley hates her Pead. Poor Dr Sellapan. :(

 

Everytime we bring her in for check ups she will wail as soon as we step into the clinic. And this started happening when she was 6 months old.

 

So recently we took her for her 13th months check up and vaccinations and we tought, OK it has been 6 months or more since her last visit, she should not remember. No such luck, the minute she saw the doctor she started crying and protesting. sigh the drama!!! At one point she punch either my hubby or the doctor. And dont even get me started on the cry until vomit,  I won't even go there.

 

She is tiny for her age. 8.5 kgs only at 13 months. I have seen babies 10kgs at 3 months... but I am not complaining....makes it easy for us to carry her hehehehe.

 

Apart from her crying episode, she is in good health! *happy dance*

Mid Year Update

 

Almost 14 months post partum and I still look like I am pregnant! I have internet friends, close friends, family members people on the streets congratulating me *slaps head* That bad meh??!! Actually yes loh... I have shy away from cameras waist down and my boobs and my tummy have become ONE.

 

The funny thing is that I only put on 5kgs in the whole span of my pregnancy and I lost it all and more after the first 4-5 months post partum. I blame birth control pills! And now I gain back everything minus 5kgs! Sad case indeed.

 

I give myself till next June to actually look decent on my baby girl's 2nd birthday. I PROMISE!!! So in hopes to return looking normal and fit into my clothes I have enlisted a help of a personal trainer 3 times a week, slimming sessions (which I doubt will work ) and torturous lympathic massage session once a week.  oohhhh and to reduce my hand to mouth exercise ASAP! If all of that does not work then I think God is telling me to get pregnant with another child... coz the fatness may be a sign.

 

OK

 

Enough about my fatness.
 

Our lil Ashley turned one 1 month plus back! How time flies.

 

 

 

I am so totaly in love with her. She can be handful at times but then again which toddler isn't. Quick update.
 

She finally drinks her milk. One fine day she hand signed to my mom MILK and we gave a bottle of milk and to our surprise she finished it! Since then she will have her milk maybe twice a day. FINALLY!!!!
 

Her molars are out! OUCH!
 

She started walking at 13 months! And it was baby steps! hehehehe so proud!

 

She can sign to us MILK, BATH, BRUSH TEETH, WASH HANDS, EAT, BYE BYE, FLYING KISS.

 

She understands many words and can follow 2 step commands.

 

She went thru sleep training and now is able to fall asleep by herself.

 

 



 

10 Months Already?

My blog is becoming a dusty old place :)

 

I was browsing through it and my last post about my lil girl was when she was 5 month old. Tommorow my lil pumpkin will be 10 months old. How time flies. I was suppose to document her every month milestone but it has been a many months of crazy sleepless nights and hectic days.

 

Even until now, motherhood has not been easy. I do not know weather I have a high need baby or I am being too hard on everything. But whatever it is I keep trying to look at the positive side of everything and constantly reminding myself to stay positive and tommorow will be a better day.

 

Ashley is one lil girl that really dislike milk. I have been having tug of war with her while feeding milk since she was an infant. So at 9 months I finally threw in the milk bottle and decided she is weaning herself from milk. Now I only offer her the bottle in the morning and most of the time she would refuse the milk. She takes 5 meals a day now and she is thriving well. I try to give a well balanced diet...try.... :)

 

My battle with her on milk has been super super hard, I would give her she would cry push the bottle away, switch to cups, straws, spoon and she would taste it and spit it back out onto my face. Cute it may seem, but that always brings my day down.

 

Next challenge is sleep. She wakes up so frequent in the middle of the night that I have develop high blood pressure and lack of sleep and zombified every single day. I am still hoping this is a phase and one night she will sleep through and everyone in the room will get a good sleep.

 

Apart from all these challenges, Ashley is growing up fast with many antics that sometimes I dont know if I should cry and laugh! She can stand up, crawl very very fast and climb. She is taking her solids very well and love her yogurt. she is also very vocal now and if we dont reply her she gets louder. Oh she has 8 teeth and we are suspecting her 1st molars are coming in really soon. One thing I am very proud of her is that she understands simple instructions, and she know what she is allowed to do and what she is not allowed. She really has a mind of her own. And...she loves to share :)

 

If she has a piece of cracker on her hand she would offer it to us. She would also give her pacifier to us when she wakes up. She would clap her hands when she gets super excited and will bite when she is geram. She will choose which toys or books she wants to play or read to. She will ask to on the her music. She loves to go out and about.

 

2 more months and my lil baby will be a toddler. So so fast. Cant believe it sometimes :)

 

 

Our Joyous, Drug Free, Gentle Birth Story

I always wanted a Caesarean delivery. ALWAYS...until I stumble across Hypnobirthing .  It totally changed my view and perception on birthing. It also changed my husband’s view as well. At first we were very sceptical about it, so we decided to enrol ourselves into Wai Han’s intensive course. Those two days was an eye opener and Caesarean was wiped out from our mind!

When I went for one of the routine scans, I discussed with my doctor about Hypnobirthing and he immediately agreed and asked if we have our birthing plan. He proceeded to tell us he had delivered a baby through hypnobirthing once many years ago and was excited to be able to do so again.

I started having period pain like cramps on my 37^th week of pregnancy and was feeling heavy but I did not do much as I was busy running around getting my work sorted before going on maternity leave. Then the night before going into my 38^th week of pregnancy I could not sleep, the period pain aches was getting stronger. Again I did not think it was labour, until the next morning at 9am I went to pee and I spotted a group of whitish blobs that looked like barley in the toilet bowl. There was no blood, no leaking nothing. Oh my gosh!! Is this my mucus plug?! Isn’t it supposed to be bloody all? I Woke my husband up and we were both staring into the toilet bowl deciding what it was...when we looked at each other we knew, it was TIME!! Our lil girl is coming !!             

Soon then I had my breakfast and started to feel the surges. I started my breathing exercise and started listening to my rainbow relaxation and birth affirmations and rolling on my gym ball. Surprisingly I was calm, hubby was calm and when I finally called my mom to tell her that her granddaughter was coming soon, she was calm as well!!! My surges moved on till late afternoon as it got stronger and more frequent.

At about 5pm we decided that we will go to the hospital as my surges was getting closer and closer but not regular. So we took out hospital bags, the gym ball and went to the ER.

As I walked into the ER I told the nurse I am in labour. She looked at me crazy… I was not in pain, looked calm and smiling. She would have thought I am a mad woman! She took my details and I gave her my birthing plan and told her my doctor is aware and has signed for it. The nurse wanted to wheel me to the birthing suite but I told her I am ok walking but they insisted its hospital policy.

When I went into the birthing suites, the mid wife looked at me and asks me if I am sure I am in labour? Once again I don’t look like a woman in labour! The nurses set me up in a birthing suite and proceed with the entire IV prep, hospital gown and so on. I told her I am having a hypnobirth. Again crazy look at me…my hubby told her to check my files as my birthing plan was in it.

She called my doctor and all was good. I agreed to be monitored for 20 mins and she told me my surges are not close enough and we would have to wait for my doctor to come. My doctor came at 9pm and he told me he wanted to do a VE on me. I agreed as I know he won’t break my water bag and do anything funny. I was 3cm dilated! Sheesh…he told me this will be a long night! Maybe 6-10 hours.

When he left, my surges started to get more frequent but we were left alone in the birthing suite. My hubby set up music and I was riding each and every surge. I even had a hot shower, ate and drink. At about 11pm I started to have very strong surges. We called the midwife and she asked if she was allowed to do a VE, I then allowed it, she was gentle and when she was done, she told me that I was 8cm dilated and baby is coming. YAY!!!The midwife proceeds to call my doctor in while I was still riding the strong surges. I could feel my baby moving down and turning.

When my doctor came, I was propped up and he told me my baby is crowning. I was told to push but I did my birth breathing. After a few surges my doctor told my hubby that the baby head is halfway out and is still in the water bag. But seeing that I am having difficulty breathing her out the doctor asked permission to break the water bag, we agreed as at the time they could not find the heart beat and it has been about 5-6 surges. So he popped the water bag. At one point my doctor told me to feel her head, and I did!! I felt her hair!! After a few more surges I was at the what  Wai Han would call the “hallmark” and that is when hubby reminded me that this is the time she would come and meet us. And just then, my lil baby girl was born.

She was immediately given to me and her eyes were wide open when we met. She knows me!! And when my hubby called her, she responded! Such joy. We had 1 hour of skin to skin bonding and immediate suckling which she managed while my perineum was being stitched up. I am very proud to say that it was a natural tear and no episiotomy whatsoever. Hubby manage to cut her cord and then she was whisked away to be wrapped.

We are so happy that we manage to have a birth that we wanted. A gentle, natural and drug free birth. Our birth plan was respected and followed through. It was something that my hubby and I will never forget.

5 month old Ashley

Our baby girl is 5 months old this week. It has been a long ride filled with ups and downs.

 

Now I truly understand the meaning of motherhood. It is NOT EASY!

 

Since our little girl was born our lives have been filled with challenges one after another. It started with her being born really small at 2.3kgs 2 weeks shy of her EDD, but then again she was ready to come and see us and create havoc! She had jaundice for almost 2 months due to being a small baby and boggle head. Her glucose level was low so she had to be on drip and phototherapy for one whole week.

 

When we finally got home, my breastfeeding nightmare begun. At first I had so little milk so I struggle to meet her demands and refused that she be fed fomula milk. So I diligently pump every 3 hours throughout the day and night until when she was 2 months my milk factory broke down due to over pumping. And because I was not fully educated on breastfeeding and was misinformed, I stopped due to antibiotics to treat my nipple infection. Well as a consolation at least she got 2 months of goodness.

 

Then we switched her to Formula Milk and then we slowly found out that she is allergic to cow's protein. She started to have eczema!! We then switched to hypho allergenic milk and it sis not go away. In the midst of all the switching, she suddenyl refuse to drink milk. Milk intake dropped and we found ourselved struggling to feed her milk every time.

 

At 4 months her eczema peaked and we switched her to soy milk. Slowly she started drinking and then she refused milk again. At 4 and a half month we soon realised she was not gaining any weight and we had to start her off with solids. Then she had her first fever which landed her in the hospital.

 

Today at 5 month old I decided that I should started documenting her every month milestones, likes and dislikes and one day when she is old enough she can read all about herself!

 

At 5 months old baby Ashley can recognise people, places, show likes and dislikes, turn over and turn back, sit with assitance, Loves her rice porriage, carrot puree, pumpkin puree, does not fancy her soy milk, apple and pear puree, loves music and TV, loves water. Hates her vitamins.Loves baths. Loves going out. Loves her toys especially Lamchop the lamb, Fiona the skunk, Allie the sheep and her many many zebras.

 

 

I am a Mummy!

She is finally here!

Life as a mom....

Challenging and a steep learning curve!

Nothing can ever prepare you...

Our lil Ashley is my new teacher.

Happy 3 month old!

...and the countdown begins...

We are into our 37th week!!

Had our check up today, baby girl is estimated at 2.8kgs and mummy has not gain any weight since the last post but has lost half a kilo. My GD is under control, thanks to my wonderful limited choice of food, hence the not gaining weight part.

Oh...yes...lil bub's head is down and has engaged!!!

ANYTIME NOW!!!

Super anxious, excited and scared at the same time.

Gonna put all our hypnobirthing practices to good use and stay positive and have a gentle and enjoyable birth.

...till then...
 xoxo

31 Weeks Update

This week's checkup was great...my lil girl has got hair!!! measuring at 1.2cm approx!! Actually don't really care if she has got hair or not inside me but then my MIL was pestering us about it for months, so we ask Dr D to scan for hair. That will keep her happy for a while.

Lil bub is now 1.8kgs and so far I have put on 5kgs in total. Let's pray it will not climb pass 10kgs. But am begining to see that maybe having gestational diabetes is a blessing afterall. I have been watching what I put into my mouth and have been swimming almost everyday.

Up until Wednesday, my feet to starting to swell up and getting pretty numb by the end of the day. So by the end of the day, I don't walk like a human but more like a duck. But am not complaning much as I know I only probably have about 8-10 weeks to meet my lil girl!!

Talking to her everyday to tell her to turn into a good birthing position and to engage well and to help me and Dr D for a smooth and fast delivery! Don't want all the hassle and drama before meeting our lil girl.

I Have Gestational Diabetes - %^&*$%^*$%^*$^&%

So my glucose blood test came back with a positive on gestational diabestes (GD) oh hooray @#%^*^

On Thursday I went in to do a blood test at 8am after a night of fasting and then was given a huge cup, YES a HUGE CUP not a shot glass, of horrible extremely sweet no-words-can - decribe sugar syrup/water/potion to drink. Held my breath and gulp it all down only to find my throat closing up at the end causing a gag reflex. But I finished it! Anyone who is not diabetic that have that will automatically become one! IMHO la....

So I assume I can go eat breakfast coz I was super hungry BUT Noooooo I had to wait two more hours and come back for another blood test to determine my glucose level. %^&$%#* NOTE: a hungry pregnant woman is a monster! Two very grumpy hours later, the lab took my blood and I had to wait another two freaking hours for the result. Two very long hours later, Dr D told me my readings. Before sugar killing water it was 5.5mmol/L after the sugar killing water my glucose level shot up to 10.4mmol/L. For nomal people it shud be below 7.8 mmol/L. So that means I have *drum roll* GD!!!

Immediately, Dr. D wanted me to see a dietician and come back on Saturday for a 4 point blood test. What luck!! ^&*%$^&$&

So off to the dietician I went. I was put on a 15 point carb diet. Meaning in one day I have have 15 servings of 15 grams of carbs. For example, 1 slice of bread = 1 serving of carbs; 1/3 bowl of rice = 1 serving os carbs; 1 medium apple = 1 serving of carbs. Sounds miserable!!

So I manage to fullfill 15 point carb diet and I bought myself a blood glucose monitoring machine thingy. Cut long story short, for the past 2 days which I went on my dietition's diet, my reading was normal and yesterday I went on my normal diet and my reading was normal. then what the hell is wrong??!!

Nope there was no mistakes in lab result nor any monitoring machine. I have GD period. Just need to monitor what I eat and prick myself now and then. Goodbye Haagen Daz, good bye Chatime, good bye Starbucks Ice Chocolate.

On the bright side, my GD was not triggered by my weight, it was mostly due to genetics (thanks to both side of my parents), me being Asian, me having all the hormones shot during my IVF and IUI days, me being a "matured" age. On the down side, as my pregnancy progress, my GD might get worse as my pregnancy progress on.

So here is to healthy eating and praying I will sail through this for another 12 weeks plus minus and have a natural gentle birth to my lil baby girl.

Good things will come to me at the end.... a healthy baby with the birth that I wish for :)

27 1/2 Weeks Update

Birth Plan for Hypnobirthing - big fat stamp of approval from our Dr! YAY!!

Baby girl is 1.1 kgs at 27 half weeks.growing according to specs :) - YAY!

I have put on a total of 5kgs in 27 half weeks. - YAY!

Sugar in urine detected -+2 reading. DAMMIT!!!!! must be all the stupid sugary cravings for the last two weeks. Back for a Glucose Blood Test in two days time.

Discussion of possible preeclampsia coz I look a bit swollen. BOO!!!

Proud of My Bump

I LOVE BEING PREGNANT!

love love LOVE!!

Generally people are nicer to pregnant woman. They hold the lift door for you, they smile more at you, the pull up chairs for you, they open doors for you, they let you jump que to use the toilet, pay for things etc...

Just because you are pregnant, people go all the way out to make you feel comfortable. Even our own JPN ( Jabatan Pendaftaran Negara).

Few weeks ago, I followed the hubs to make his new MyKad and I notice that they have a special number for special people like for the elderly, disabled and me; pregnant women! This special number holds a special power. You don't have to wait like all the other normal people!!!

So, fastforward last week, I decided to go make my new MyKad just saja wanna change to my new address and also just want to shiok sendiri to go press for the "special number". When I was there, I proundly press the E button that only dispense special numbers and I beamed to myself ( funny how small things like that excites me!)

Almost immediately, less than 10 seconds my number was called.... so I slowly walk up to the counter and was greeted by a young man who then we have a very interesting conversation. I dunno who was more embarrased...him or me. It was all in Malay but it went something like that:

Man: Excuse me miss, I think you got the wrong number. This number que is for the elderly, disabled and pregnant women.

Me: Huh? But I am pregnant. 

Man: Are you sure? You don't look pregnant.

*proceed to show him my bump by pulling my blouse tightly on my belly* - I was wearing kinda fitted top - be pround of you bump show it! thats my motto

Me: I am 6 months pregnant. Can't you see??!!!

Man: Oh sorry, please have a sit. You just look a bit fat.

*sheeshhhhhhhhhhh kebabsss*

Me: That is good for me then, I look a bit fat only.

Man : sorry miss, a lot pf people pretend to be pregnant to jump que.

A lot of people actually pretend to be pregnant to jump que??!! what kinda sick people are those? sigh... But then the man was very embarrased and apologetic..hehehe I was shocked, slightly happy coz I dont look like a whale. At least not yet.

So there.... just to share with you guys.... also please go change your MyKad before they make it absolute compulsory and then you will have to que for eternity. Tip: Go after lunch...

3 More Months!

3.5 is the number of kilos I have put on for the last 6 months of my pregnancy. Lil girl is about 800 grams, am not sure how heavy the placenta or the water bag but am not concern as long as baby is growing and doing fine. 3 more months and I have left max of 6.5 kgs to put on. *fingers cross* please be not more than that!

The doctor has put me on a daily swimming routine. He has asked for me to do so to reduce my cramps and to open up my pelvic and reminded me again and again to do my Kegal exercise 3 times a day. That I always forget.

Have been thinking about my birthing plan. At the very begining or since forever, I always told myself I will op be C-Sec delivery. Don't think I can stand the hours of labor pains and contractions and baby coming out from my "vjj". But lately, I have been having different opinion. I have decided to go for all natural delivery that I have actually started reading up about Hypnobirthing. The concept is very simple actually, to birth in a relaxed method, painless, stressless, without the need for medication. Sounds amazing and almost unrealistic!! I mean in society we all associate child birth as the most painful thing a person can ever endure! In Hypnobirthing, it is believe that with fear, our body and muscle tense up, therefore there is resctriction to the movement of muscle and it will cause the pain. Makes perfect sense!

Anyhoo, I actually went and lookup for a support group in Malaysia and guess what??!! I found not only a support group but a certified Hypnobirthing Childbirth Educator! I also bought the book on Hypnobirthing, The Mongan Method and read it from cover to cover and I actually saw a light at the end of the birthing tunnel. Spoke to hubs about it ( he also pro C-Sec) and  he  has actually agreed to go for classes and that is what we will be doing this weekend... 2 days of intensive class.

I have also spoken to my Dr on my rough birthplan on doing Hypnobirthing. I was so afraid that he was agaist it as many doctors in Malaysia and hospitals rather just go with their own plan than to accomodate to the parents to be plans. But we were surprise, Dr. D actually have delivered a baby through Hypnobirthing. And he is all for it, whatever that makes us happy. But he did have a condition that if there happen to be any emergency, he would have to take over. Seems fair enough. So after the classes, we will write up our final birth plan for him to approve. SUPER EXCITED!!!

Almost 24 Weeks

Almost 24 weeks into my pregnancy.* happy dance*

All is well.. we confirmed again during our last visit to the Dr that baby girl is indeed a GIRL... nothing wrong with having a girl...so to all the aunties and KPCs...we dont care if it's a girl or boy... and we are happy just the way we are!

Yup, can sense my annoyance. Everyone has something to say or to "advice" ...what do I do, one ear in another ear out. I don't mind advice and all but some are just amzingly crazy!! If I want advice I will ask. Thank you very MUCH!!!!

So far I have put on 2kgs throughout this 24 weeks and hopefully my next scan next week, I will see a steady weight gain for myself and baby girl. Nothing more than 9-10kgs for my whole pregnancy *fingers cross*

Let see, I have been feeling lil bub moving and kicking and punching and twirling in my womb. She gets excited when she hears her daddy speaks. She wakes me up every morning at 7 ish ...my lil alarm clock. I can't wait to actually see movements from my belly...It will be awesome!

Baby shopping has already started and I have been going crazy... the hubs is also going crazy with me swipping the card! We are waiting to do up the nursery and hopefully by end of March everything is done and I can rest and ready myself for my third trimester and birth in June. Exciting times!!!

Till next entry...here is a pic of me and lil bub at 18 weeks :)

18 Weeks

WE ARE HAVING A GIRL!!!

*happy dance*

dont get me wrong, we would love a boy too but for our first born we i wanted a girl :)

As long as baby is happy safe and healthy I guess we are also bless that way.

We are saying 99% sure of a girl for now... things can grow...lol

Funny story.

While we were doing the scan,  Dr D ask if we wanted girl or boy and we say like what any other parents would say..."oh we don't care as long as the baby is healthy"

Then Dr D told me I have someone to inherit all my bags!!! I was like whoppeee we are having a girl... I gave a OK sigh to the hubs and he was like yippee...

Then Dr D sed wait...I see something... then he went like it could be a boy but there is no two lil thing (balls) but the the a tiny lump inbetween...could be a tiny penis or a puffy clitoris. *slaps head*

The my baby peed!!!! And D D went like yup its a girl! The direction of the pee pee shows that its from a vagina not a penis.

My lil girl sure knows how to make things easy.

So there you go,  a GIRL!!! Hubs heart already belongs to his daughter no doubt about it! I am just super double over the moon.

The rest of the scan went well... after a while she feel asleep from all the fuss. Sure does have her character this one...

I am already in love with her.

12 Weeks

We have finally reach our 12 weeks mark into pregnancy. Everything is looking well at this stage.

Not much drama except for some uncontrollable gagging, pregnancy fatigue, dizziness, peeing non stop and 2 weeks of full on flu.

We went in for our routine check up with Dr D yesterday and lil bub was as excited to greet us. He/She was literally doing jumping jacks in my belly. Scared me a while there and the hubs asked what is that!? Lil bub seems pretty active which I am not complaining at all :)

We are over the moon and keep praying that we will have a safe delivery and a healthy and happy baby.

Life Is Funny That Way

18 OCT 2011

Myself and hubs don't believe in miracles... but a miracle happened to us.

WE ARE PREGNANT!!

No drugs, no IVF, no injections, nothing just au natural.

It would take me 3 months to post this up but I just wanna jot everything down first incase preganancy brains kicks in.

It all happened on 18th October 2011, 3 days after my 32nd birthday. I have been late for two months and I have called my doctor and he suspected that I was preggers... what did I do? I laugh at him! I told him it is not possible.  So on the day of my appointment with Dr. D, I woke up at 6am (before my morning hike) and in a state of drowziness I peed on a stick. Before the urine could reach the test window, I already saw the positive line! Talk about something which took me years to see and it was happening in front on me!!!

I yelled so loud to hubs and switched on every single light in the room and I was shaking mad...hubs was just numb for a second and he hugged me and tears all around.... we did it!! we effing did it!!!

That morning we went to Dr D and lots of yadda yadda...me not having my period, might have PCOS, suspect preggers...we just kept hush about our positive test...until he announced he was gonna do an internal ultrasound on me and that is when hubs freaked and spill the beans! But no biggie, we still did the internal scan.

It was the most painless scan ever! As our little "kuaci" pop up on the monitor! We got a confirmation that I was 4 weeks in my preganancy and OMG the nurses was so excited and so was Dr. D and hubs and me... I was laying on there with my legs spread open and 5 pairs of eyes were glued on the monitor looking at our blob. It was amazing. Has not sunk in me yet but still amazing that we manage to come this far.

We decided not to tell anyone yet as 4 weeks is really not that stable...anything could happen....so we only told my parents and my in laws. All gave us a reaction that we were telling a big fat lie! LOL! My mom practically went "you must be joookiiiingggggggg??!!"

At this point, I am having symptoms like super tender breast, peeing all the time, tired/sleepy, bloating like mad, dizzy spells.

We are praying hard that everything goes well and we get to hear the heartbeats in Week 6.

xoxo

32 and 5

I turned 32 last weekend! and celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary!

So what if we don't have kids.

Being a D.I.N.K .is pretty awesome.

*D.I.N.K = Double Income with No Kids *wink*

The Case Of The Missing Eggs : Revisited

Aunt Flo is late for 5 days. Highly suspect I missed ovulation yet again! No eggs released to the uterus??

Gonna give it another week and if Aunt Flo does not show up, its Dr D's office.

How to get pregnant naturally like that?

This sucks ass.

Reflecting In Hua Hin

It's September already??!!

Bangkok and Hua Hin for the last one week was a blessing. It did clear my mind a lot and I am thankful for the trip. Gave me a lot of me time to reflect.

Being back in Penang again and seeing the evidence of my IVF was a bit heartbreaking but not as bad as what I used to feel. I guess it will always have a scar.

I am OK. sore, but OK

Post IVF #1

Time flies..it has been one week since we found out that we were not pregnant. And it has been a tough week. Thank goodness I have a great support system...family, friends and strangers. I can't thank them enough!

I admit, I still break down when I am alone. Hubs talks sense into  me everyday when he sees me about to succumb to tears. I guess this kinda grief takes time to heal. So I am not gonna lie to myself and say I am 100% ok... I am not, but I will be. I still feel the pinch when friends and family announce their preganancy or post up baby pictures. Yes I am sore.

I kept myself busy this one week by working and by planning a mini getaway to Hua Hin. So by the end of this week for the Raya break, hubs and I will be back in Bangkok and then make our way to Hua Hin for a few days. I do not know if it will make me feel better but I for sure knows that I need to get away from everyone for a while.